Dirk Tourette - rhythm guitar / vocals
Songwriter and co-founder, Dirk refers to himself as "the chief", which you probably agree with one way or another. He and Donny recruited band members from amongst potential candidates at the school assembly and so you can blame them for this beastly behemoth of a band.
In addition to writing songs, performing songs and telling you to "f*ck off", Dirk likes to force alcohol upon the other members of the band, thus fuelling the fire that burns in the belly of this unstoppable rock juggernaught.